she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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