There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
