i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
