I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Actions speak louder than pants.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
