break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
