it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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