I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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