Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
