he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
