also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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