TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
