at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
the day after is always just damage control
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
