hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Randomize
