Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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