Screwed.edu
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
