just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
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