You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
