we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
