they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
