Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
