yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize