Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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