Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
do herpes really smell.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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