quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
