There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize