He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I will be naked everywhere
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
