she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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