The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
