i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
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