If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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