the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize