The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
The adults are the big ones right?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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