i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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