Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize