ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize