We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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