I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
