I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I bet he comes in French.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize