Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
