Your dad touched me again.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
