I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
