with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize