I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
