idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
