Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
why is half of my head shaved?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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