Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
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