He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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