Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
