New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
