this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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