dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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