Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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